How do you think denial relates to honesty for parents?
Angela: Denial a coping mechanism. It is the inability to be honest. No parent or individual coping with alcoholism or addiction means to be in denial. From my own very painful experience, denying was the only thing I could do at the time because I did not want to accept the reality of my situation. Often in a family system dynamic, denial not only protects the parents from the behavior of the child, but also from having to look at their own issues or childhood wounds.
Aaron and Angela, do you have any additional thoughts on the principle of honesty for parents or individuals struggling with alcoholism or addiction?
Angela: Honesty is empowering because it frees the individual from pretending to be something that they’re not. I think it’s important to make mistakes and tell the truth about them. Honesty not a rigid goal to achieve. Honesty is not a tightrope, or something that has to be perfect. Honesty isn’t not making the mistake. Honesty is catching yourself in the mistake.
Aaron: For parents, we understand how frustrating it can be to realize that nothing you’re doing to help your child has been working. This is why the principle of honesty is critical for families, as well. In order to begin the recovery and healing process for your family, you have to get honest about how much you’ve been enabling your child, and whether it’s helping or contributing to the problem.
If you or someone you know is struggling with alcoholism or addiction, please call Brass Tacks Recovery at (888) 277-8225. We care.